My siblings moved out recently, which of course I’m absolutely shattered about, but it sure did open up a lot of space. I used that space to create (with a lot of my mother’s help) my beautiful home studio. It’s still a work in progress as I’ve got a lot of stuff I want to add, both decorative and functional, but I’m working on a part time “sales associate” salary here. Already though, it’s my perfect little nook. Something about a bedroom makes me want to spend hours watching Netflix and passive aggressively reblogging on Tumblr. But in my perfect little nook I can spend hours learning piano, practicing guitar, writing these blogs, and scouring the web for useful tools.
What I’m still unable to do, is write a goddamn song. I’ve got a confession to make. I can’t remember when the last time I wrote a song was.
I’ve been rewriting, completing, and adding to old songs, but I can’t for the life of me dig out a shiny new ditty. Professionally*, it’s not really an issue right now, I’ve got years worth of angsty lyrics to make at least 3 albums**. Personally, I’m a little crushed. Isn’t this what I do? Why can’t I do it anymore? I’ve got a few theories.
– I have nothing interesting to write about.
– I’ve run out of chords.
– I’ve lost it.
Let’s address these one by one, and let’s start with 3 by crossing it the fuck out.
“I’ve lost it”. That’s just a melodramatic excuse. Oh sure it’s a thought and a constant one at that, but it need not be properly addressed because it’s bullshit. It’s what somebody soothes themselves with when they’re ready to give up, but I’m not there and I hope to God I never will be.
“I have nothing interesting to write about”. That’s true to an extent. My life isn’t particularly dramatic at the moment and I honestly don’t have a problem with that. Does it have to be dramatic for me to have material though? While I may not have interpersonal troubles (for the most part), I haven’t really gotten to the bottom of my psyche and that’s what this is all really about, isn’t it? It is, but my life drama has always given my emotions context. I guess I need to find that juice elsewhere so I never have to rely on a broken heart again***. I’m thinking of finding it in a book, so if you have any suggestions please reach out.
“I’ve run out of chords”. Yeah, I have. Of course, it’s not impossible to write a bunch of different songs with the same 3 chords, but it’s not particularly inspiring****. That’s what happens when you never properly learn theory. So I’m properly learning theory. I’m not even halfway there, but I already feel like I’ve got a magic toolbox instead of hammering a nail to the wall with my fist. Learning is cool, stay in school.
That’s the message I want to leave you with, ‘learning is cool, stay in school’. Or ‘if you can’t write, read’? ‘Don’t give up’ is a classic. Whatever, I’ve always been shit at conclusions.
* Am I a professional? Is that what I’m considering myself now? Lol, that’s bold.
** Will somebody please let me make 3 albums?
*** That sounds so sappy and I hate it but I love it.
**** I do know more than 3 chords, but you get my point.